An open letter to Starbucks:
If the cup size is small, then call it a small!
Don’t try to confuse me and call it a tall!
And if “grande” means big, then imagine my surprise
When a “grande” coffee is fuckin’ medium-size.
And how big is Venti? 20 ounces? Twenty-six?
I don’t speak Italian, you pretentious pricks!
So here’s a message for you clowns at Starbucks,
Dunkin Donuts kicks ass and YOUR coffee sucks!